Lady Luck had taken an instant dislike to Jane from the moment she was born.
A
series of complications ensured she plopped out of her mum prematurely,
resulting in being trapped in the incubator for a good couple of
months. Then followed a series of incidents that can only be put down to
pure bad luck. A sleepy nurse had handed her to the wrong parents; as a
result, she had grown up with an alcoholic father and a bulimic mother.
Jane
was almost always picked last in school for games owing to her small
frame, was a wallflower when it came to parties, and being
underdeveloped at seventeen ensured she still hadn’t gotten her first
kiss yet.
Jane
ran away from home at nineteen, hooked up a ride with a some hippies
and, when their truck was stopped by a policeman for speeding, was
promptly arrested along with the group for drugs and whatnot. Lady Luck
perhaps decided to throw the poor kid a bone here, since the policemen
who took the hippies in gave Jane a once over, checked her belongings,
and told her to get the hell out of there before they changed their
collective minds.
The first town she chose had a sleepy little population of 400 people.
Prosecutors would later argue that the murders started exactly two days after she entered town.
Jane just smiled.
May 28, 2012
May 15, 2012
The Long Dark Tea-Time of The Soul - Douglas Adams
(Might contain some spoilers)
The Story
Strange things are happening in London. Police are baffled by a mysterious death - a man is found dead in a room, all doors and windows securely locked from the inside. The police would gladly term it as suicide; only, the man's neatly severed head is sitting a few feet away.
Around the same time, an explosion at a check-in counter of Heathrow airport has the authorities puzzled - no one has gotten seriously hurt, and there are no explosives to be found at the place that would actually explain how the explosion happened.
Dirk Gently, holistic detective and lazy bum, decides to look into the matter.
Just so you understand what kind of detective you're dealing with here, let
us get to know Mr. Gently better, shall we? It has been a full 3 months since
Dirk has opened his fridge, and, afraid of what unspeakable things might be
taking life inside, he opts to throw it out and buy a new fridge instead. If Dirk
Gently's in his car heading someplace and needs to ask for directions, he
doesn't. No sir. He just chooses a car that looks like it knows where it's
going and follows it.
So, anyway, Dirk Gently starts his investigation and runs into Kate Schechter.
Kate Schechter has gotten herself involved in the matter purely by an unfortunate coincidence. She is waiting at the check-in counter for her Oslo flight, minding her own business, when she notices the man before her is being impossibly obtuse. First, he doesn't have a ticket; when the check-in girl asks him to buy a ticket, he doesn't have the cash; he opts to pay by cheque instead, and gets deeply roused when the check-in girl tells him they don't accept cheques.
On the verge of missing her flight, and exasperated beyond endurance, Kate offers to pay for his ticket, and will he please write the cheque over to her –
At this point he thoughtfully replies
he doesn't have a cheque book. Kate pays nevertheless, but the last straw is
when the girl asks for his passport and he slowly replies he doesn't have that
one, either.
Kate walks away then leaving the man and the check-in girl to argue in peace, and moments later the explosion happens. The obtuse guy happens to be none other than Thor, the God of thunder and a lot of other things, as he introduces himself to Kate at a later stage (unfortunately for him, when she’s in a foul mood) –
The
plot also includes Odin, Thor's dad, Toe Rag, Odin's weasly side-kick
not unlike Gollum of LOTR fame, a green monster, and a couple of others
who are unimportant, so I've forgotten their names.
You've got to read the book to uncover the mystery of the death, the explosion, and other things - it wouldn't be fun if I wrote everything here.
My Take
Douglas Adams had already wowed me with The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, so when my husband suggested reading The long Dark Tea-Time of The Soul, I didn't need to think twice. Since Douglas Adams had already achieved perfection with The Hitchhiker's Guide, I consciously had somewhat low expectations from this one. I was pleasantly surprised - he dealt with the serious topics of death and explosions and father-son relationship strain with due respect, and he had me in splits at the same time.
Some parts of the book are particularly funny. At one point along the way, Dirk picks up a newspaper and turns to the horoscope page, and reads his horoscope for the day -
The horoscope for that paper is
written by The Great Zaganza, an old friend of Dirk’s who knows his birthday :P
Whatever his plot might be, Douglas Adams manages to infuse a hilarious riot of humor into all his lines. The only complaint I have with this book is, he ended it much too abruptly. He could easily have gone on for another 50 pages or so without boring anybody, but he chose instead to end it with an abruptness that must’ve surprised him as well.
If you found the plot and the story gripping, go ahead and read the book. If you haven't - well, read it anyway because it is so awesome :D
The Story
Strange things are happening in London. Police are baffled by a mysterious death - a man is found dead in a room, all doors and windows securely locked from the inside. The police would gladly term it as suicide; only, the man's neatly severed head is sitting a few feet away.
Around the same time, an explosion at a check-in counter of Heathrow airport has the authorities puzzled - no one has gotten seriously hurt, and there are no explosives to be found at the place that would actually explain how the explosion happened.
Dirk Gently, holistic detective and lazy bum, decides to look into the matter.
Just so you understand what kind of detective you're dealing with here, let
us get to know Mr. Gently better, shall we? It has been a full 3 months since
Dirk has opened his fridge, and, afraid of what unspeakable things might be
taking life inside, he opts to throw it out and buy a new fridge instead. If Dirk
Gently's in his car heading someplace and needs to ask for directions, he
doesn't. No sir. He just chooses a car that looks like it knows where it's
going and follows it.So, anyway, Dirk Gently starts his investigation and runs into Kate Schechter.
Kate Schechter has gotten herself involved in the matter purely by an unfortunate coincidence. She is waiting at the check-in counter for her Oslo flight, minding her own business, when she notices the man before her is being impossibly obtuse. First, he doesn't have a ticket; when the check-in girl asks him to buy a ticket, he doesn't have the cash; he opts to pay by cheque instead, and gets deeply roused when the check-in girl tells him they don't accept cheques.
On the verge of missing her flight, and exasperated beyond endurance, Kate offers to pay for his ticket, and will he please write the cheque over to her –
"My name is Kate Schechter. Two 'c's, two
'h's, two 'e's, and also a 't', an 'r', and an 's'. Provided they're all there
the bank won't be fussy about the order they come in, they never seem to know
themselves."
Kate walks away then leaving the man and the check-in girl to argue in peace, and moments later the explosion happens. The obtuse guy happens to be none other than Thor, the God of thunder and a lot of other things, as he introduces himself to Kate at a later stage (unfortunately for him, when she’s in a foul mood) –
"I am Thor. I am the God of Thunder. The God
of Rain. The God of the High Towering Clouds. The God of Lightning. The God of
the Flowing Currents. The God of the Particles. The God of the Shaping and the
Binding Forces. The God of the Wind. The God of the Growing Crops. The God of
the Hammer Mjollnir."
"Are you?" simmered Kate.
You've got to read the book to uncover the mystery of the death, the explosion, and other things - it wouldn't be fun if I wrote everything here.
My Take
Douglas Adams had already wowed me with The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, so when my husband suggested reading The long Dark Tea-Time of The Soul, I didn't need to think twice. Since Douglas Adams had already achieved perfection with The Hitchhiker's Guide, I consciously had somewhat low expectations from this one. I was pleasantly surprised - he dealt with the serious topics of death and explosions and father-son relationship strain with due respect, and he had me in splits at the same time.
Some parts of the book are particularly funny. At one point along the way, Dirk picks up a newspaper and turns to the horoscope page, and reads his horoscope for the day -
"You
are very fat and stupid and persistently wear a ridiculous hat which you should
be ashamed of."
Whatever his plot might be, Douglas Adams manages to infuse a hilarious riot of humor into all his lines. The only complaint I have with this book is, he ended it much too abruptly. He could easily have gone on for another 50 pages or so without boring anybody, but he chose instead to end it with an abruptness that must’ve surprised him as well.
If you found the plot and the story gripping, go ahead and read the book. If you haven't - well, read it anyway because it is so awesome :D
April 29, 2012
Now Reading: The Warden, by Anthony Trollope
"The Warden" is the first novel in the series, "Chronicles of Barsetshire", and Trollope's fourth novel.
This is my first Trollope - I love Victorian literature, let's see how it goes.
This is my first Trollope - I love Victorian literature, let's see how it goes.
April 02, 2012
Cracked on Nicholas Sparks
I admit there was a time when I almost took Nicholas Sparks seriously - I had just finished reading Erich Segal's Love Story, and naturally turned to The Notebook. Never got to reading it though.
Cracked.com has this amazing article on Nicholas Sparks, and his formula for a successful novel / movie.
I have included a short part of it here -
Please oh please, read the full article. Will make your day.
Cracked.com has this amazing article on Nicholas Sparks, and his formula for a successful novel / movie.
I have included a short part of it here -
Please oh please, read the full article. Will make your day.
March 14, 2012
The Famous Five turn 70
 |
| Five on Finniston Farm |
When I first read the news on The Guardian I was taken by surprise - somehow, every time I read these books I like to think those adventures are happening right now, in the present. To think that Enid Blyton dreamed and penned those books more than seven decades ago can only make us envious of her imagination.
Would you like to relive those books? If not in entirety, here is a short paragraph about each book's story. A review, if you will. "Five on Finniston Farm" is one of my favorites. Yours?
March 06, 2012
Comics and kids
I started reading books when I was about eight to ten years old. My
earliest memories of reading books include my Dad - he would buy stacks
of Chacha Choudharys, Champaks, and Tinkles and hide them somewhere at home. Every time me or my brother did something constructive (could be as
simple as walking on my Dad's back for five minutes) he would produce a
book with a flourish, make us yell and scream for it a bit and then
leave us in peace to read.
When I look back and think about my childhood, I am sure it wouldn't have been the same if all those books weren't in my life. I cannot imagine a world where I didn't know Chacha Choudhary and Sabu, or Billoo and his famous hair which always hid his eyes. I cannot imagine how it would have been if I didn't know who the Famous Five were, or how the Secret Seven won their battles. Half my childhood was spent in that world, a world where anything could happen - it was my world. Thus said, I want to stress that this habit of mine never adversely affected my studies. If and when my grades suffered they did because of various other reasons ;-)
I know several people who won't let their child read any book apart from what is in their academic syllabus. Maybe it is because they feel their children might score better if they spent the same time doing some math sums. I want to say to you, don't rob your children out of the incredible joy of reading. While they might enjoy watching the occasional Tom and Jerry on television, the happiness a kid gets when he reads a Tinkle, or a Calvin, is unparalleled.
For all you parents who might not be able to afford the costs of buying storybooks, that is what second hand bookstalls are for. You can easily get Tinkles, Amar Chitra Kathas, Chandamamas, etc. for as low as 10 rupees per book.
Perhaps this activity can be on your To-Do list for this weekend.
When I look back and think about my childhood, I am sure it wouldn't have been the same if all those books weren't in my life. I cannot imagine a world where I didn't know Chacha Choudhary and Sabu, or Billoo and his famous hair which always hid his eyes. I cannot imagine how it would have been if I didn't know who the Famous Five were, or how the Secret Seven won their battles. Half my childhood was spent in that world, a world where anything could happen - it was my world. Thus said, I want to stress that this habit of mine never adversely affected my studies. If and when my grades suffered they did because of various other reasons ;-)
I know several people who won't let their child read any book apart from what is in their academic syllabus. Maybe it is because they feel their children might score better if they spent the same time doing some math sums. I want to say to you, don't rob your children out of the incredible joy of reading. While they might enjoy watching the occasional Tom and Jerry on television, the happiness a kid gets when he reads a Tinkle, or a Calvin, is unparalleled.
For all you parents who might not be able to afford the costs of buying storybooks, that is what second hand bookstalls are for. You can easily get Tinkles, Amar Chitra Kathas, Chandamamas, etc. for as low as 10 rupees per book.
Perhaps this activity can be on your To-Do list for this weekend.
June 09, 2011
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
I have never read science fiction before; I'm not familiar with the genre except for the odd super-hero movie now and then.
List of characters -
Arthur Dent. The unwitting earthman saved by Ford Prefect when Planet Earth is destroyed to make way for a new hyperspace bypass expressway.
Ford Prefect. One of Arthur's closest friends. He is a researcher from a faraway planet in the vicinity of Betelgeuse, and he is aware of the impending disaster to planet Earth. He was commissioned to Planet Earth to research material for the book, The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy.
Marvin, the paranoid android. An uncontrollably depressed robot, he can make ferocious machines commit suicide simply by making them listen to his woes.
Zaphod Beeblebrox. The two-headed President of the Galaxy, inventor of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (a drink), thief of the spaceship Heart of Gold, only known survivor of the Total Perspective Vortex, and what else... yes, seven time winner of "Worst Dressed Sentient Being in the Known Universe". Try beating that.
Trillian. Ex-Earthling. Arthur tried picking her up at a party once, but lost her to a cool dude. He is later revealed to be Zaphod Beeblebrox, and that Trillian had decided to pack stuff and go away with him because she found Earth really boring.
Slartibartfast. An architect on the planet Magrathea who designs planets for rich space-people. Kind of like a landscape artist, you might say. Oh, and he designed the Earth. Even received an award for the stunning coastline of Norway. Yes, the Earth was tailored to suit certain requirements.
The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy. A fictional electronic book that features prominently in the actual novel of the same name. Provides quirky insights into various situations. For example, when Arthur and Ford hitch a ride in the Vogon ship, the entry on Vogons reads, "Here's what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: forget it."
The Story
The story is pretty much simple and straightforward. Earth has just been demolished into nothingness and Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect are forced to hike a ride with the Vogon airship that was the cause of said destruction. People whose only job in life is blowing up planets cannot be sweetness and light; our hitchhikers are unceremoniously thrown into space by the Vogon captain, but not before giving them a dose of Vogon poetry (considered the third worst in the world; people have died just listening to it.)
I cannot resist sharing Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz's heart wrenching poem with y'all - read, and weep/laugh/pull hair.
Elsewhere in the Galaxy, the two-headed President Zaphod is on his way to a spaceship unveiling. Right there, on the spot, he decides to steal it. The ship is the Heart of Gold, and due to its improbability drive lands at the exact spot where Arthur and Ford are stranded, thus saving their lives. This is where we're introduced to Marvin - the chronically depressed robot.
All of them then continue their journey through space, and finally land on a desolate planet, Magrathea. The people of Magrathea once upon a time (millions of years ago) were engaged in designing customized planets for the rich uns of the galaxy; then the recession came, and they just decided to sleep through it. Here we learn quite a handful from their architect Slartibartfast about what the Earth actually was, why two tiny rats want Arthur's brain, and yes, why exactly the Earth was destroyed.
Amidst all the hullabaloo the four of them - Arthur, Ford, Zaphod, and Trillian manage to make it back to the ship after being unwittingly saved by Marvin's depression (the battleship committed suicide after listening to Marvin's woes).
They then decide to go somewhere for lunch. The Restaurant at The End of The Universe.
My Take
You often come across books that drag for the first 50-odd pages - make you so sleepy you want to fling them against the wall, and just when you're about to give up, suddenly pick up pace. We have an exception of sorts here. The Hitchhiker's Guide is a feisty little bonanza that hooks you from the foreword itself. The book is wittiness at its best. Not the snicker-once-and-you're-done sorts, this is the ROFL kind of humor, the one that makes your tummy ache.
I used to read this in the local train, and I admit I got a lot of disconcerted stares - people probably thought I was loony or something, the way I snorted so many times. And get this - Douglas Adams wrote this book in his twenties! Makes the rest of us twenty-somethings go green, doesn't it!
Absolute must-read.
List of characters -
Arthur Dent. The unwitting earthman saved by Ford Prefect when Planet Earth is destroyed to make way for a new hyperspace bypass expressway.
Ford Prefect. One of Arthur's closest friends. He is a researcher from a faraway planet in the vicinity of Betelgeuse, and he is aware of the impending disaster to planet Earth. He was commissioned to Planet Earth to research material for the book, The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy.
Marvin, the paranoid android. An uncontrollably depressed robot, he can make ferocious machines commit suicide simply by making them listen to his woes.
Zaphod Beeblebrox. The two-headed President of the Galaxy, inventor of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (a drink), thief of the spaceship Heart of Gold, only known survivor of the Total Perspective Vortex, and what else... yes, seven time winner of "Worst Dressed Sentient Being in the Known Universe". Try beating that.
Trillian. Ex-Earthling. Arthur tried picking her up at a party once, but lost her to a cool dude. He is later revealed to be Zaphod Beeblebrox, and that Trillian had decided to pack stuff and go away with him because she found Earth really boring.
Slartibartfast. An architect on the planet Magrathea who designs planets for rich space-people. Kind of like a landscape artist, you might say. Oh, and he designed the Earth. Even received an award for the stunning coastline of Norway. Yes, the Earth was tailored to suit certain requirements.
The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy. A fictional electronic book that features prominently in the actual novel of the same name. Provides quirky insights into various situations. For example, when Arthur and Ford hitch a ride in the Vogon ship, the entry on Vogons reads, "Here's what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: forget it."
The Story
The story is pretty much simple and straightforward. Earth has just been demolished into nothingness and Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect are forced to hike a ride with the Vogon airship that was the cause of said destruction. People whose only job in life is blowing up planets cannot be sweetness and light; our hitchhikers are unceremoniously thrown into space by the Vogon captain, but not before giving them a dose of Vogon poetry (considered the third worst in the world; people have died just listening to it.)
I cannot resist sharing Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz's heart wrenching poem with y'all - read, and weep/laugh/pull hair.
- "Oh freddled gruntbuggly/thy micturations are to me/As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
- Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
- Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!"
Elsewhere in the Galaxy, the two-headed President Zaphod is on his way to a spaceship unveiling. Right there, on the spot, he decides to steal it. The ship is the Heart of Gold, and due to its improbability drive lands at the exact spot where Arthur and Ford are stranded, thus saving their lives. This is where we're introduced to Marvin - the chronically depressed robot.
All of them then continue their journey through space, and finally land on a desolate planet, Magrathea. The people of Magrathea once upon a time (millions of years ago) were engaged in designing customized planets for the rich uns of the galaxy; then the recession came, and they just decided to sleep through it. Here we learn quite a handful from their architect Slartibartfast about what the Earth actually was, why two tiny rats want Arthur's brain, and yes, why exactly the Earth was destroyed.
Amidst all the hullabaloo the four of them - Arthur, Ford, Zaphod, and Trillian manage to make it back to the ship after being unwittingly saved by Marvin's depression (the battleship committed suicide after listening to Marvin's woes).
They then decide to go somewhere for lunch. The Restaurant at The End of The Universe.
My Take
You often come across books that drag for the first 50-odd pages - make you so sleepy you want to fling them against the wall, and just when you're about to give up, suddenly pick up pace. We have an exception of sorts here. The Hitchhiker's Guide is a feisty little bonanza that hooks you from the foreword itself. The book is wittiness at its best. Not the snicker-once-and-you're-done sorts, this is the ROFL kind of humor, the one that makes your tummy ache.
I used to read this in the local train, and I admit I got a lot of disconcerted stares - people probably thought I was loony or something, the way I snorted so many times. And get this - Douglas Adams wrote this book in his twenties! Makes the rest of us twenty-somethings go green, doesn't it!
Absolute must-read.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)